My fuck toy will be returning this week from being away for far too long. We’re both very excited. As the date grows closer, I’ve been thinking about the shape I’d like our relationship to take. We’re both kinky as hell and enjoy each others’ imaginations and various fetishes, but we’ve struggled a little with how far the D/s should go. I have a rather stressful job, so spending loads of time and mental energy supervising him just isn’t ideal, and it’s not really what he wants either. We like the idea of 24/7 D/s, but have decided to start with the bedroom and then go with what feels natural from there.
To aid me in my ponderings, I’ve been checking out other people’s blogs. I’ve found maymay’s, Tom Allen’s, and Thumper’s to be quite helpful. The latter two have a focus on male chastity (although Tom Allen often addresses other concepts), which, as I’ve mentioned, isn’t exactly what I want. However, Thumper’s post on the bliss of only ever enjoying orgasm with one’s partner struck a chord in me. Fuck toy and I enjoy control, but I don’t like putting him in chastity for too long because I enjoy his orgasms and I enjoy riding him for ages and then coming together. In fact, for his impending birthday I’m going to make him come till it hurts, and that’s a very exciting idea.
However, all of these are things that he can do with me. He’s not going to be allowed to come on his own anymore. That isn’t to say that he’ll come any less often or that he won’t be allowed to watch porn. Just that his orgasms always have to happen with me. Being so intimately tied in with his sexual pleasure will be fun. Just as Thumper’s said, I have no problem with men’s masturbatory habits generally. Masturbation isn’t a problem or anything. And sometimes, if I’m sleepy, I may allow him to simply masturbate beside me as I snuggle up to him. But always sharing that moment will, I think, be rather magical and deepen his submission.
Sometimes he won’t be allowed to come, and there will certainly be plenty of times that he doesn’t get to come as soon as he’d like too (I love edging). However, realistically, most days he will have an orgasm because I enjoy watching him in that moment. I love his face, his noises, his surrender. It’s beautiful.